Day 42 — Bargaining
Matthew 19:16 (MSG) – ‘Another day, a man stopped Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”’
I am not sure about you, but when I was at primary school, everyone was friends. In junior and then senior school that changed, and I learned that for some friendships to work, it required bargaining and me adapting to the majority’s taste and views. As you grow up, you realise negotiation becomes part of life, ‘If I give you this, will you give that to me?’ or perhaps, ‘If I secure that client, will you give me the promotion?’
When we experience a loss or are going through the process of losing someone or something, part of grieving is that we try and bargain. Bargaining is a natural reaction to the helplessness and vulnerability we feel, as we are trying to regain some control. We try and make a deal: ‘I will always follow you, God, if you take away the cancer/stop my business from failing/stop my marriage ending...’. Our minds scramble to try to control the outcome and will try to make deals, even with God, to be assured of a good result.
In this passage in Matthew, the rich young ruler is trying to bargain… he is trying to get eternal life, and wants to know what he must do, what he must offer to seal the deal.
We often feel that we need to win God’s approval; that if we do something, say something, give something, then we will get something from him. Every time we hear the song ‘The Blessing’ we are brought to tears, and its due to the lyric, ‘He (God) is for you’. So why is this such a powerful line? It’s because it reassures us that we don’t need to earn anything, we have God’s approval from the get-go.
We don’t need to bargain. We don’t need to win him over. He is already for us, totally on our side.
Prayer: God, we thank you that you are for us, that you do not require us to do or say anything, you simply require our hearts, and all we need to do is love you. Help us understand and receive this acceptance this week.
Zoe & Andy Clark-Coates
mariposatrust.org
soultears.org